Add A Wife, Lose A Job!

Denise and I announced our engagement to our family and friends in Philly and Sarasota. It was a really exciting time for both of us. We posted our engagement notice in the newspaper, and were flooded with tons of good wishes. I was proud to be engaged. That was quite a change in tone...considering I used to utter the phrase,"I'll never get married!". Usually guys who say that really need to wait and find the right woman. Seriously....wait. I did. Do the world a favor.

We were experiencing that "pre-wedding" glow. Our engagement period was 11 months. That's just enough time to enjoy the moment, plan the wedding and ponder the future together. In fact things were going so well...that Mr Charlie Foxtrot ( you're smart, figure out the hidden code) was just waiting to pay a visit to our blissful lives.

Mr Foxtrot showed up in the form of a drop in ratings for the morning show in August of 1990. I didn't think much of the dip in audience share. The morning show ratings sky rocketed and an occasional blip is common. Unfortunately, the station management went into a panic mode! They decided to change the entire format of the station. This kind of knee-jerk reaction is not that uncommon in my business. Imagine if the Dallas Cowboys won 10 games in a row, then lost one by 20 points. Would owner Jerry Jones dump the team and replace them with soccor players from MISL? Of course not. But Jerry Jones isn't a radio executive.

First the station announced that the new format would "Oldies". HA!!!! I'm freakin 27years old playing music that came out BEFORE I was born. Who is Herman...and why does he have Hermits? When I was on the radio in Philly, I interviewed stars like David Bowie. In the oldies format interviews were harder to come across....because most of the acts were dead! This new "radio opportunity" was not going to last forever.

Denise has always been the most supportive partner in any storm. And this was a STORM. The wedding is now weeks away, and I'm playing garbage like, "I'm Henry the 8th I am". She implored that I look elsewhere for work! I started sending out tapes of my show to radio headhunters. Thankfully, I got a nibble from a great man named Jim Meltzer in Buffalo, NY. He flew me out twice to interview at a heritage radio station called KISS 98.5. We quickly hit it off, and it was clear we both wanted to work together. BUT...the clock was ticking in Sarasota. On September 12th 1990, the bad news arrived in a Fed Ex package. I was being let go from the Oldies station.....just 8 weeks before our wedding. OY!

Jim Meltzer in Buffalo agreed to hire me 6 weeks later. But now a new problem arrived; How do we plan a wedding in Philly, while our "stuff" sits in Sarasota, and start a new job in Buffalo??? One word..DENISE. Somehow she was able to hold down all three forts, while I started my new job. I was actually on the air for only a few days. Denise and I drove a rented minivan back to Philly to get married. We only had 1 day for a honeymoon...then back to Buffalo. We then flew to Sarasota to move our "stuff". Eventually, things calmed down. Denise and I were able to take a real honeymoon the following year.

Denise and I look back on that tumultous time around our wedding and laugh. Charlie Foxtrot tried to screw things up. But Mr Foxtrot underestimated how much love Denise and I had for each other in November of 1990. And our love has only grown stronger.

Next... "Get me out of Buffalo!"

Honey....Are You OK????

Denise and I decided to get married the following November. Usually, the man goes out and buys the ring FIRST....then gets down on one knee and proposes marriage. As you read in the previous blog posting, it didn't "roll" like that. Now Denise and I had to go out and pick an engagement ring... together.

Shopping for diamonds with your future wife has both pros and cons. Let's start with the positive aspects: a) You'll see which design she truly likes b) It's very romantic c) The ring won't have to go back to the store for proper fitting.

Now the negatives of being in a jewelry store with your soon-to-be finance: a) She will pick a diamond that you certainly could never afford in 100 years of working at your present job! b) There is no "b"...it's just a world full of "a".

I must have had a psychic premonition about the cost factor as we walked into the De Soto Square Mall in Bradenton, Florida. I had never given serious thought to what the costs are with diamond engagement rings. As I got out of my '86 blue Toyota Corolla, I just stood there in the parking lot and pondered the $$$$$. I literally just stood there....frozen...didn't even blink my eyes. Denise stopped and starred, and started calling my name. She said that I "didn't look good", that "I was pale".
No kidding!

There was some good news about this shopping adventure. We only had to buy the diamond. Denise's mom worked at a small jewelery store back in Philly and passed along the store discount for the mounting. Even though it was a small ring, it was still the most money I had spent for something I couldn't drive or sleep on.

We eventually picked a diamond to go with the mounting. I proposed to Denise on December 15, 1989 in the living room of our apartment. We celebrated at a restaurant called Bandstand in the Sarasota Quay shopping mall. Interestingly enough..our marriage outlasted the restaurant AND the mall!

Up next...."Congrats on the wedding....you're fired!"

If You Want to Marry Me....Stop Hitting Me!!!!

Sarasota in November is like....heaven. The sun is still bright, but the heat leaves town. Cooler breezes make the palm trees sway. Days off from work are spent driving around with the windows rolled down, or with sliding glass doors left wide open. That was the setting for the big talk about the "M" word. When women mentioned the "M" word..men would sweat and fall to pieces! All over the globe, the "M" word had made guys stammer and come down with a bad case of the flop sweats. The "M" word question was about to show up on a beautiful Sarasota Sunday in October 1989.

Denise and I were sitting on the floor reading. She looked up from her magazine and asked,"Do you think we'll ever get married?". This question came out of left field. She broke the silence with that life-changing question. "Sure", I replied, patting myself on the back for coming up with a positive response on such short notice. What do you think was Denise's follow up question? After I gave her the "thumbs up" answer she asked, "When?". I rolled my eyes back and forth and declared, "I dunno know". (Roll flashback video)

I was involved with a gorgeous brunette named Sandy before I met Denise. We were really serious for about 9 months. Sandy lived like she was waiting for Robin Leach to interview her for "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous". She drove a Jaguar and lived in a high rise condo in Philly. Sandy loved fancy restaurants and society parties. One Sunday morning she asked me if we were ever getting married? Seriously. I tipped down my newspaper and said," Nope". That was the first thing that came to my mind. I didn't want to get married to her...or any other woman. Well, no sooner than I answered with a negative response, Sandy came flying at me with her hands in the attack position. She grabbed the front of my shirt and starting screaming. "Why are we dating if we aren't getting married?", she yelled. And I mean YELLED. She was crying, punching, screaming, kicking, etc. "WOW", I thought to myself. "This is not the way to convince somebody to marry you". I grabbed my stuff and ran out the door, and never looked back. BTW, Sandy ending up calling me in '98. She was divorced, had a couple of drinks and wondered how I was doing.

After the "Sandy" flashback played in my head, I told Denise I wanted to marry her...but I didn't know when. "How about next year?", she asked. "How about in 5 years?", I countered. "How about next year", she asked again. So basically, no matter what future date I could throw out, Denise wanted to get married the following year. OK.....done deal. We agreed to get married the following November in 1990. I leaned over to kiss her, and then we both resumed reading. That was fairly pain free.

The agreement that I just entered into didn't really hit me until we made it official, and went.....RING SHOPPING!

3 Quickies (Stories)

Before I get to the story of our engagement, I just had to share these 3 little gems!

Denise and I were keeping busy and having fun on the nation's Gulf Coast! She was looking for a job in Sarasota, and I was focusing on my radio show. Coming around the corner....her birthday! I made sure to get her a really nice present, make my famous pasta w/homemade garlic sauce for dinner, and run to the supermarket bakery for a cake with candles! Dinner was a big success and Denise loved her gift (earrings). I went into the kitchen, lit the candles and came out with a big New York style cheesecake for dessert. Denise looked at me and started to cry. "What's wrong?", I asked. "I don't like cheesecake!", she replied. I thought everybody from Philly or New York liked cheesecake. It just upset Denise that she could be spending the rest of her life with a guy who didn't know her likes/dislikes in the dessert world. BTW, we both joke about ordering cheesecake when we're out to dinner...

Denise thought it would fun to come with me one morning and watch me work at the radio station. UGH! She's not the first person to float that idea. Radio is still one of the few places where people are in awe at the production and delivery of a morning show. 95% of people abandon the idea when they find out that "wake-up" is at 4am! I was worried, but the little trooper was up and ready to rock in the wee-hours of the morning. We jumped into my Toyota Corolla and sped towards my pre-radio station stop; the 7-11 convenience store. I couldn't start the day without my large HOT coffee, newspaper and Hostess fruit pie. Denise and I pulled up to the station at 4:45am. I asked her to hold my coffee while I got the paper from inside the car. She put the 20oz cup of joe on the bumper of the Corolla. When I shut the car door, the coffee (IN SLOW MOTION) began to fall towards earth!!!!! We stared while gravity stole my piping hot addiction. I gave Denise the meanest look EVER! Seriously... I gave her the look of danger!! She actually drove (stick shift) my car back to the 7-11, and returned with a fresh cup. That incident occured in '89, and Denise has never again suggested going with me to work.

And finally, in '89 the founder of one of America's largest chains of restaurants had listened to my morning show and became an instant fan. He (no name) reached out to the radio station and wanted to meet for dinner. At the time his restaurant (guess!) was only on location #3. I brought Denise to join us and things started out OK. He was a fan of radio and began listing his favorite stations and personalities. I was feeling very insecure about working in the very small radio market of Sarasota.....having just been in the VERY large city of Philadelphia. I started getting edgy every time he (still not telling) mentioned jocks in larger cities. In fact, I started bad-mouthing them....for no good reason! He couldn't mention a single radio personality w/o me calling them names. In fact, it got downright uncomfortable. When dinner was over, Denise and I got into the car, and the can of whoop-ass was opened. She blasted me for being such an insecure jerk. I remember her yelling like it was yesterday....AND..she was right. I learned a valuable lesson that night. And I never heard from that restaurant guy ever again. BUT....we occasionally eat at the concept he created. There are locations all over Houston...and the entire country!

Get Your Own Pizza!!!

Things were going GREAT in Sarasota, Florida. I was getting into the routine of hosting my own morning show, making new friends, spending time at the beach and no longer dealing with cold Philly winters. February '89 was gonna get a lot better once my "honey" arrived.

Denise resigned from her job at the radio station, and couldn't wait to get to Florida. Seriously...she really couldn't wait! The drive from Philadelphia to Sarasota takes a normal driver about 18 hours. Most people break the trip into 2 parts....usually spending the night in South Carolina at a well-lit motel off Interstate 95. Not Denise! She decided to drive straight through...with out stopping for rest. And this non-stop drive-a-thon was performed by a single woman WITHOUT a cell phone. I went to sleep one night and expected to see her the following day. There was a knock on my apartment door around 4AM. A familiar voice was on the other side. There she stood....exhausted from the driving the jam-packed Nissan Pulsar 1,110 miles. We hugged. She showered and went to sleep...and didn't wake up for 15 hours.

Denise and I settled into the tiny apartment I chose by myself 2 months earlier. The rent was only $440 per month for the fairly new 700 sq ft unit. The furniture was purchased from a recently divorced co-worker who needed money. In fact, the sofa was only $50!! Why such a deal? Well, the four legs were missing from the bottom of the sofa. I didn't care. It kept our butts off the floor. To this day I wonder who had the four sofa legs? In just a few days Denise was able to put her decorating skills to work...and the apartment starting looking like a $500 a month unit.

Things were going well....until the infamous "Bikini Volleyball Story".

I was asked to host an event on Siesta Key beach that featured Hooters waitresses playing volleyball against any willing opponents. Keep in mind it was for charity, and the women wore string bikinis. I brought Denise to the tournament and went about performing the usual host duties. The problem was...I slid back to my old ways. I was staring at all the bikini-clad players....and not watching Denise. In fact, 3 different guys tried to pick up my girlfriend, and I didn't even notice. I was so infatuated with the "game", I wouldn't have noticed if my shorts were on fire! The piece de'resistance? Denise put down her book, got up from her lounge chair and asked me to please get her a piece of pizza. I pointed to the hospitality tent and said," It's over there. Get it yourself".

Steam shot from her ears like a cartoon character. She just quit her job and relocated to a new state for a guy who would rather watch bikini babes than get her something to eat. The old Sam was back in town. Today, I would fly a plane full of gasoline through hell to make her comfortable...but on the beach in '89...that wasn't the case. The argument that ensued was the biggest ever. She wanted to end our relationship and move back to Philly. Luckily, she stayed with me in Sarasota. I guess Denise just couldn't handle the thought of leaving the beaches, Manatees and that adorable $50 leg-less sofa!

Coming next....."Do you think we'll ever get married?"

I Made Her An Offer She Couldn't Refuse!

Life in Sarasota, Fl was awesome!!! I arrived in December and escaped the cold of the northeast for the beaches of the Sunshine State. I was actually getting a little tan from all the beach time. The 3 weeks we spent apart were tough. I would go to the radio station every night to call Denise. It was a pain to drive over there, but it beat having to deal with a MONSTER long distance phone bill.

I was able to fly back to Philly on Christmas Eve. Denise met me at the airport. We ran back to her place for Chinese food, drinks and lots o' huggin. It was freakin' freezing that night!!!! Cold crunchy snow covered the ground and we were layered up in turtlenecks and sweaters. We agreed that she would come visit me in February. That was the good news....the bad news was that we would be apart for nearly 6 more weeks.

Denise finally made it to Florida as another snowstorm was getting ready to attack the east coast. Sarasota was sunny and 80 degrees the day she arrived. In fact, the weather that week was specifically ordered by the Chamber of Commerce. I would host the morning show, then run back to my apartment to spend the day with my GF at Seista Key beach, followed by a late afternoon visit to the apartment complex hot tub. I learned how to make marguarita's....and that was all we drank. Denise was getting sad about returning to the snow and slush, so I made her AN OFFER SHE COULDN'T REFUSE.

I told Denise that if she quit her (really good) job in Philly and moved to Sarasota, I would pay all of her expenses for 6 months. If you knew how cheap I was back in '89...then you would be impressed by my offer. Seriously.. I was REALLY cheap. Once at a club, Denise asked me to get her a gin and tonic. An hour later she asked me to get her another round. "I already bought you a drink", I declared. She still laughs when remembering that story. Denise also takes credit for freeing me of my cheap-itis.

BTW....she jumped at the offer! Denise went back to Philly and resigned from her job, packed her stuff into a 1986 Nissan Sentra and drove non-stop to F.L.A.

Up next...the famous "bikini volleyball story" that almost ended our relationship!!

Hello Florida...Goodbye Denise..???

I left my Philly radio job May 5th, 1988. I made it through the show like nothing horrible would happen. I even kept smiling when Charlie the program director called me into his office. It was a performance worthy of an Academy Award! Denise told me the ax was about to fall, and I acted like a bonus check was on the way. "Thanks, love ya, blah blah blah," said the program director. I took my severance and went home.

My birthday arrived the following week. OY...who feels like celebrating when your cash flow drops to ZERO? Denise accepted the "cheer up, it's your birthday" mission with gusto. She picked me up in a limo and arranged for a very fancy dinner in downtown Philadelphia. We laughed, drank, ate, drank some more. She was successful and brought a smile to my face.

Dinner was over and the check arrived at the table. She offered to pay, slid her credit card into the check holder, and excused herself to the restroom. The waiter approached the table to alert me to the fact that the credit card wouldn't clear. It was Denise's card.....she was in the restroom...so, I just used my card to pay for my out-of-work-birthday-dinner. Holy cow was she embarrassed!!!!!! I still bring up that story when we're teasing each other. It's a freakin winner!

I finally received a job offer in Sarasota, Florida in December of '88, and I took it! Look....it was the only offer in 6 months. I was actually a finalist for a morning show gig in Rockford, Illinois. Thank goodness some other schmuck got that gig. I was headed to the gulf coast of Florida. The good news would be met with some sobering questions: What would happen to Denise? Would she come to Florida?

Denise and I agreed that the job was a great opportunity. Our relationship could wait while I got settled in to the new station. I packed up and left Philly, my family and the love of my life. Denise stood on the steps and waved goodbye while I left for the 18 hour drive to Sarasota.

I had a new job, and a great new apartment. The radio station was actually on Sarasota bay. Every morning I would look out the window and see dolphins and manatees. When I finished the show, I would head out to Siesta Key beach. I had 2 new friends named Karen and Maria. They were both waitresses at the local Hooters. We did a lot of promotional events together and became buddies. Just in case you're wondering, they were both beautiful women who would lay on the beach in tiny thong bikinis. Traffic-stopping thong bikinis! I enjoyed spending time with them.....but didn't feel any desire to take it a step further. My heart belonged to Denise back in Philly. It was quite a change in attitude. Months earlier, I would hit on women IN FRONT OF Denise. Now I was laying on the beach a thousand miles away with two stunning hotties, and thinking of the woman who would only shake my hand after our first date. Mr. Semper Fidelis finally arrived!!!!!

Now it was only a matter of time before I could get Denise to Florida to meet my new friends. I just had to make her an offer she couldn't refuse.